Daily Lies & Statistics: I’d like to [blank] the Academy

Oscar Night. Such an exciting event that I watched Celtics-Wizards instead. What happened? Did that movie about the blue people win anything? I heard someone joking this morning that Sandra Bullock won for Best Actress for that TV movie about football. Could you imagine? Ha. Well, it was probably someone like Meryl Streep. I’ll read up on it later.

An obviously Photoshopped image of Sandra Bullock winning an Oscar. You can find anything on the wacky web!

I got better things to do, with the fantasy hoops season winding down pretty quickly. It is already March 8, shocking when you consider that it seems like just yesterday when this web site was launched in the preseason, bringing a nation together and feeding those starving for fantasy basketball analysis on the cheap. And with the old saying “you get what you pay for” posted above each of our cubicles here at DL&S headquarters, we charge ahead, looking back only to whine. And also to recap the previous day’s events. ‘Cause that’s what we do.

Sunday’s Notables:

In Boston, a real upset was brewing with the Wizards up 13 on the Celtics with about six minutes left. The Cs awoke from their slumber in time to squeak out a 86-83 win and avoid home losses to the Nets and Wiz on consecutive weekends. My boys have looked like an old team this year, so you’ll have to excuse me if I don’t feel like the addition of Michael Finley addresses this at all. Despite the best efforts of stat hounds Al Thornton (24 & 11, 3 stl) and Andray Blatche (23 & 9), Washington choked the game away. Celtics fans can’t be buoyed by Blatche, Thornton and JaVale McGee vastly outplaying their own front line, even if McGee became the first seven-footer in basketball history to play over 30 minutes and grab just one rebound. He did have five blocks and should be picked up if you need those as he has swatted 19 shots in his last five.

The Pistons, playing without Rodney Stuckey after Stuckey suffered a seizure and collapsed on the bench Friday night, pulled off a 110-107 win over the Rockets, who are now an offensive juggernaut. Kevin Martin and Aaron Brooks are enjoying their green lights (27 and 25 points, respectively) and Luis Scola (20 & 15) has been a beast lately, averaging 21.3 points and 18.0 boards in his last three. On the Deeee-troit Basketball side Tayshaun Prince is taking over, what with high-priced free agent busts Ben Gordon and Charlie Villanueva wallowing in awfulness. Prince had 29 points and 10 boards and is averaging 20.2 points over his last five. Will Bynum (12-4-11, 2 stl) got the start at point guard for Stuckey, whose status going forward is uncertain. I’m making a move for Bynum if I’m a Stuckey owner for insurance purposes.

It’s a shame to watch the Lakers struggle on their road trip (three straight losses to Miami, Charlotte and Orlando yesterday, 96-94). This is a team that played 17 of its first 21 games on the road. Now Kobe is calling out teammates and the league’s most talented team by far is disjointed. Am I smiling a little more after Kobe missed a 20-footer at the buzzer that would have tied it? Yes, yes I am. But let’s not dwell on this too much as L.A. should get it together. Orlando, meanwhile, has won five in a row and Jameer Nelson (15-9-7 Sunday) is finally playing like the fantasy stud we drafted him to play like. Vince Carter even had a good game on Sunday, scoring 25 points on just 10 shots. No word on whether or not this has accelerated Armageddon.

Chris Bosh returned to the lineup after a stomach bug and sprained ankle, but was underwhelming (12 & 12, 6-14 FG) along with his Raptor teammates in a 114-101 spanking at home against the 76ers. Sam Dalembert played just 13 minutes off the bench, for disciplinary reasons, supposedly. Thaddeus Young was a monster, going for 32 points, four steals and three threes. Jrue Holiday gave fantasy owners a reason to pursue him on the waiver wire with a nice line of 21-7-6, three threes and two blocks.

The Thunder eked one out over Sacramento, 108-102, in a game that featured Carl Landry landing an elbow on Russell Westbrook‘s eye that required six stitches. Westbrook returned to the game and had yet another nice statistical game (21-8-4) as did the regularly ridiculous Kevin Durant (27-8-5).  Landry (20-8, 9-13 FG) keeps doing his thing in Sacramento, but after he and Tyreke Evans (24-4-7) the rest of the Kings aren’t giving us much from a fantasy perspective.

Finally, Denver rolled over Portland, 118-106, and as a Chris Andersen owner I have only this to say: Johan Petro? Petro started instead of Andersen for the injured Kenyon Martin, but Andersen still did block three shots. Watch this closely as it makes sense for Andersen to get a lot more than his 18 minutes from last night going forward. Petro had 10 rebounds, but I’m not rushing out to pick him up.

Five games on the docket in what is sure to be a big week for anyone still in contention in their leagues. Good luck!


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