Daily Lies & Statistics: Sargent vs. York

When I was a young shaver, I would spend two, three, 10 hours a day watching dopey sitcoms and it has helped shape me into the man I am today. I’ve always considered myself a deep thinker, and let the proverbial proof be in the pudding, with the admission of evidence my poignant debates on which of the Darrens was most captivating. With my sincerest apologies to the two Dicks, my answer is officially Collison. It has taken me 16 weeks, but I finally have a productive guard in the Damn Lies League.

Darren Collison has Greg completely bewitched.

Like a cat, I hopped on the Yewcla product as soon as Chris Paul chose surgery as the course of action for his ailing left knee. In a season of Devin Harris’, Larry Hughes’ and Jonny Flynns, I finally have something to grin about following a 27-point, nine-assist, four-steal debut on my squad. Paul is expected to miss another month, and with the Hornets barely clinging to hope for the final playoff spot in the West, it may be foolish to bring him back at all. Point being, if he’s somehow still available, jump on Collison like you mean it.

Monday was a light night in the Association for Pituitary Cases who Enjoy Playing Basketball. Let’s see what transpired.

Orlando 123,  New Orleans 117

Vince had more points (48) in this one than Carter has liver pills. I know it may seem like an optical illusion to Vinsanity owners everywhere, but he did take out his frustrations on the defenseless Hornets with his season high total. Throw in a blistering 19-for-27 from the field and six 3-pointers and that’s quite a night for this long-time member of fantasy royalty. He was supported by Dwight Howard, who recorded another 25 points, 12 rebounds and four rejects. The Hornets had three players notch 27 or more points, including Collison, David West (27) and The Artist Formerly Known as Peja Stojakovic (29). Peja, whose corpse was exhumed moments before tipoff, also added nine rebounds and five assists.

Dallas 127,  Golden St. 117

Jason Terry posted the best fantasy line of his career in this one, erupting for 36 points, nine rebounds, six assists, three steals, six 3-pointers and 12-of-13 from the line. The move to the starting five is suiting him well. Josh Howard added 25 points off the bench and Drew Gooden contributed 24 points and 10 boards. Howard is way too inconsistent of a human being to draw in a coloring book let alone start on someone’s fantasy team. When Gooden receives starter’s minutes, he typically produces big rebounding numbers. The Warriors had only six players receive significant time and were led by Anthony Morrow’s 33 points and 11 boards. If Corey Maggette is going to miss a chunk of time with a finger injury or anything in the ingrown toenail family, there is no reason why the sweet-shooting Morrow can’t continue to post gaudy totals. Maybe not this gaudy, but solid nonetheless. Stephen Curry continued his torrid play with 25 points and nine assists and league minimum power forward Anthony Tolliver added 14 points and 11 boards in a game that must have been a joy to be a part of.

LA Lakers 101,  San Antonio 89

I don’t know why the Spurs are so blah this year as this could be their final opportunity to challenge the Lakers for Western Conference supremacy. Richard Jefferson doesn’t appear to be fitting in as well as one would have thought and perhaps they need a big man born after LBJ ruled the White House… I’m sure Gregg Popovich is equally puzzled. But Timmy Duncan is still Timmy Duncan and totaled 16 points, 15 boards and four blocks last night. With Tony Parker back (20 pts, 8 ast), George Hill (2-8 fg, 1 ast) is again starting at two guard, but had a difficult time getting it going. The Lakers, sans Kobe, were led by the best big man on the planet, Pau Gasol, who gave his owners an early Valentine’s Day present with 21 points, 19 rebounds, eight assists and five blocks… yowsa, yowsa, yowsa. Is that the big man line of the year? I would love nothing more than for Kobe to be held hostage by a group of angry Mongolians the remainder of the year and have Pow lead the Lakers to the promised land. Shannon Brown has started the last two games, but with Kobe and Andrew Bynum set to return no later than right after the All-Star break, there is little reason to pick him up.

Eleven games tonight, including Hawks/Grizzlies, Mavs/Nuggets, Thunder/Blazers.

Daily Lies & Statistics: Not so super Sunday for the Celtics.

OK, I suppose it depends on how you look at it. You can say that the Celtics were sluggish in their seven-point home loss to the Magic. Or you can say that the Celtics had a good day since they returned Paul Pierce and Marquis Daniels to the basketball court. It really depends on who you ask. I’m among those who think that Pierce and Daniels returning are better news than the Celtics continued struggles against the Magic.

A little light reading for Celtics fans.

Pierce’s line was so-so (13 points on 5-of-12 shooting, 4 rebounds and 3 steals in 30 minutes), but Daniels’ was a bit more intriguing — 8 points, 3 rebounds and a steal in 13 minutes. He’s someone we might be talking about after the Break in terms of 12-team adds. Right now, though, he’s only worth a waiver add in deep leagues. But I have a feeling that could change in the near future.

Kendrick Perkins is starting to frustrate his owners. Granted Sunday’s contest was against Dwight Howard, but he still only managed to score two points and pull down three rebounds in 23 minutes. Perk’s scoring has dropped off significantly — what little scoring he had. Over his last 10 games he’s only topped the 9-point mark just once. And what concerns you more is that while his scoring has dropped off, so too has his rebounding. He’s only averaging 4.2 rebounds and one block over his last four games. The return of Kevin Garnett and even Glenn Davis has not been kind to Perkins. I don’t think you should drop Perk, but I do think that the option of sitting him is practical.

It’s still not time to forgive Vince Carter for his horrendous season thus far, but we’re getting to the point where we can start looking him in the eye. On Sunday he posted his third straight solid scoring effort, dropping 20 points on 7-of-13 shooting. One day this guy will start to pay dividends for his owners. One day.

Who was that masked man? Oh, right, that was Hedo Turkoglu. What a guy! He scored 16 points and dished 5 dimes against the Kings. Please, keep this going Turk. Maybe the mask will do him some good. I’m sure he doesn’t want to not only look like a bust, but also look like a fool while… busting.

Jose Calderon (*cough*another bust*cough*) returned for the Raptors on Sunday. His 7 points and 2 assists in 22 minutes bored me. I’m not sure he’s ever going to get it going this season. He’s not dropable, but he’s certainly benchable. Make senseable?

Jason Thompson (death in the family) returned after missing his last two games. He did post 10 points, 6 rebounds, a block and a steal in 22 minutes, which is good for the “new” Jason Thompson, but not suitable for November’s version of Jason Thompson. I think he’s hoping for Kevin Martin to get moved. It might do his value some good.

Not much else of importance happened on Sunday (the what Bowl??), but it’s worth noting that Kobe Bryant and Andrew Bynum are both questionable on Monday night. At least that’s something.

Daily Lies & Statistics: Dunleavy done, but won’t leave

Ever fire yourself, only to find out after you dropped the bombshell that you really can’t get rid of yourself no matter how hard you try? That’s kind of what’s going on with the Clippers, as GM Mike Dunleavy has stepped down as head coach, but in the ultimate indignity, still plans on going to work every day in the L.A. front offices as the same GM he’s always been. That’ll be weird for his co-workers, no? If this was indeed Dunleavy’s call to step down gracefully, it was a shrewd one from a GM standpoint. He was saddled with an awful coach with a complicated roster of players who pretty much couldn’t stand him. I’m talking about him, too. It’s all the same guy.

Mike Dunleavy made a tremendous move yesterday to help the future of the franchise.

I’m confused. I need to consult with the editor version of me to see if what I’m writing makes any sense. (Checking.) The answer is “No.” But we’re writing it anyway.

The perfect summation of the Clippers.

(Editor’s Note: Here’s what happened. Dunleavy actually saw the writing on the wall and stepped down. But he’s not leaving because he’s owed a lot of money. Oh, and I’m still Jeff Andriesse writing this.)

The fantasy implications here are not that huge, unless the players get a shot of adrenaline from not having to deal with Dunleavy on a day-to-day basis. But they’ll know he’s peering at them from a luxury box, and will they even want to risk running into him at the copier?

It will be interesting to see who the Clippers hire, and if it affects their ability to be players this offseason in the free agent bonanza. Donald Sterling is probably already in talks with LeBron’s mother.

Speaking of LeBron, he played point guard last night and delivered a virtuoso 36-7-8 in a win over Miami. The Cavs have their eyes on Antawn Jamison and Troy Murphy to give them a boost, but look pretty strong regardless despite Mo Williams and Delonte West being out. The addition of deep-shooting power forwards who can spot up for LeBron like Jamison or Murphy is a pretty scary thing to consider. Now if they could just get Shaq to stop eating on the bench.

Portland earned a nice victory over San Antonio last night, 96-93 at home (but almost blew the game, surviving a wide-open missed three by Manu Ginobili that would have tied it late). As now required of anyone who covers the NBA, I’m obligated to praise Nate McMillan for what a great job he’s done with these Blazers after all the injuries. Their star, Brandon Roy, is probably back this weekend, but Portland does need to make a move for a big man since amateur photographer Greg Oden and the vowel-deficient Joel Przybilla are out for the season.

There are 10 games on the docket tonight, and most of them suck on paper. I suppose Houston-Memphis and Chicago-Atlanta are decent matchups, and of course Denver at the Lakers. There’s a chance that Kobe Bryant might not play since he is hurting all over and needs a good excuse for his five-point outing the other night. Kobe is certainly a warrior and has a high tolerance for pain, but take a few games off for the good of the team once in a while, dude. And I own you in fantasy! Why am I saying that?

Daily Lies & Statistics: You stole my Thunder

Ahh, it’s good to be back in the driver’s seat here at Damn Lies, Where Amazing Happens. As my esteemed colleague Tom mentioned yesterday, I am returning from right shoulder surgery and my rehab is going better than expected. As a matter of fact, scouts saw me throw a two-seamer the other day and pronounced me the next Sid Finch.

An artist's rendition of Greg's recovery (using MS-Paint!)

I’ve watched very little basketball the past two weeks and I consider that a good thing as the guys I’ve started in the weekly Damn Lies league have suffered crippling injuries on Monday nights, while the guys I’ve benched miraculously returned from the dead (see Harris, Devin). There has been no reason and very little rhyme to my season. I’ve had more tsuris this year than the previous 11 seasons combined.

I have found solace watching the Oak City Thunder on NBA TV as I truly enjoy their style of play. This is one of the most athletic teams in the league and here is what many are missing when summing up their incredible turnaround: They are a terrific defensive unit. Kevin Durant is clearly an incredible offensive talent who could erupt for 40 points in his sleep, but his length on the other end of the court gives opponents fits. Throw in Russell Westbrook and Thabo Sefalosha, two of the premier defenders at their positions in the league, and you have an athletic team with a passion for defense that competes every night – a recipe for success if ever I’ve seen one.

And now on to Wednesday’s damn games

Atlanta 103  LA Clippers 97

The Hawks needed a monster shooting night from Joe Johnson (34 pts, 11-21 fg, 3-4 3 fg, 9-10 ft) to come-from-behind and eclipse the Clips. Josh Smith registered 15 points, 10 rebounds, six assists, two blocks and two steals, numbers that are a nightly occurrence. Al Horford, who has shown signs of life lately, added 16 points and 10 boards. El Lay was led by Marcus Camby’s six points, 20 rebounds and six assists. Henchman Chris Kaman contributed 17 points, 10 caroms and three blocks, but was just 7-of-21 from the floor.

Philadelphia 106  Chicago 103 (OT)

Playing without ‘Son of Iver’ the Sixers got past the streaking Bulls, 106-103, in overtime. Philly was led by Elton Brand’s 26 points, nine rebounds and three blocks and he seems cemented in the starting lineup. Andre Iguodala busted out of his funk with 25 points, eight rebounds, eight assists and three steals and Sammy Dalembert contributed 10 points, 13 caroms and three blocked shots. Thaddeus Young, who I traded for about six weeksd ago, poured in two points and corralled the same number of bounds. Derrick Rose, who I traded away six weeks ago, led the Bulls with 30 points and nine assists. Luol Deng added 17 points, 11 rebound and three steals.

Boston 107  Miami 102

With Paul Pierce and his injured hoof on the sideline, the Celts squeaked by the Heat last night. Rajon Rondo was the mango, registering 22 points, six rebounds and 14 assists. Ray Allen added 23 points and three steals and Bill Walker saw two minutes of daylight and did not score. Ever notice that no one in the NBA is named Bill anymore except for Mr. Walker? Dwyane Wade paced six Heat players in double figures with 30 points on 11-of-16 from the field and added a cool 13 assists.

Toronto 108  New Jersey 99

The Nets have now covered five straight with last night’s loss to Toronto. The Raptors should be ashamed of themselves. Chris Bosh and Andrea Bargnani recorded 20 points apiece, but shot a combined 14-for-37 to do so. Sonny Weems started, played 39 minutes and contributed 14 points (7-11 fg), 11 rebounds and four assists. Looks like we’ll need to keep a eye on him for at least another game. Yi Jianlian bounced back from his dreadful 1-for-12 shooting performance on Tuesday against Detroit to total 15 points, seven boards and a block last night. Devin Harris jacked up 17 shots to tally his 15 points (4-17 fg) and Jarvis Hayes got the start at small forward and posted 11 points and five boards.

New York 107  Washington 85

Nate Robinson may have finally supplanted Chris Duhon as the starting point guard in this one as he erupted for 23 points, six rebounds and eight assists in 35 minutes off the bench. In Chris Duhon’s 13 minutes of flailing around the court as the starter he dropped a triple deuce on us. The Wizards were led by nobody as they decided not to show up for the second half.

Oklahoma City 103  New Orleans 99

We’ve spoken enough about the Thunder for one day, but Westbrook did drop a 26, 8 and 10 in this one. Marcus Thornton (22 pts, 6 ast) is playing big minutes (38 mpg over last 6) for the Hornets and should not be available under any circumstance.

Dallas 110  Golden St. 101

It took a lion tamer to hold off Monta Ellis light night, who exploded for 46 points on a ridiculous 17-of-23 from the floor as the Mavs held off the Warriors. Shawn Marion sparked Dallas with one of his better efforts of the year (18 pts, 9-11 fg, 9 reb, 2 bk) and he was supported by Josh Howard’s 19 points (9-15 fg) off the bench.

Utah 118  Portland 105

The Jazz won for the seventh time in a row as Mehmet Okur led the offensive assault with 28 points on 11-of-13 from the field. Okur has been miserable for the most part in ‘09-10, but with Carlos Boozer nursing an injury, he could be in store for some big games. Speaking of such, Maria Kirilenko’s big brother harkened the mid-aughts with 22 points (8-9 fg) six rebounds, eight assists, two blocks and two steals.

San Antonio 115  Sacramento 113

Playing in place of injured Tony Parker, George Hill posted 23 points, nine assists and knocked down four free throws in the final seconds to hold off a Kings rally. Hill played with confidence yesterday and would make for a solid short-term pickup. Tyreke Evans returned from a hip injury for Sacramento and led all scorers with 32 points and added seven boards and eight assists. This team has not been able to get it going since the return of Kevin Martin (15 pts, 6-17 fg) three weeks ago. Omri Casspi returned to the starting lineup (8 pts, 6 reb) and if he remains there could be a nice source of across-the-board production.

Phoenix 109  Denver 97

Carmelo Anthony has now missed six straight games, the last five of which he was a gametime decision. Freaking have surgery already, will you? How annoying! Good god, 17 rebounds fell into Amare Stoudemire’s lap last night. Will wonders never cease?

LA Lakers 99  Charlotte 97

Those pesky Bobcats held the best player in the world in any sport, hobby or board game to just five points (2-12 fg), but Lamar Odom converted a couple of big plays down the stretch en route to 19 points to key the LA win. Andrew Bynum tallied 17 points and 14 boards in the victory. The Bobcats were led by Stephen Jackson’s 30 points on a mind-bending 10-of-16 from the field. And a man named Nazr recorded his second double-double in his last three contests with season highs of 23 points and 17 rebounds.

Daily Lies & Statistics: Day-to-Day

The diagnosis is negative! Rejoice! It turns out that Paul Pierce’s foot is NOT broken, just sprained. He has been updated from headache to day-to-day. Right now it seems that a return to action this weekend is likely. And boy do the Celtics need him. They have been old awful of late, losing four of their last five. Even the young guys like Kendrick Perkins are struggling. Perk hasn’t hit the double-digit scoring mark in any of his team’s last eight games. In fact, the Celtics in their last 10 are 22nd in the league in offensive efficiency and

Hear me now! Life's a trip when you're day-to-day. As da' clock keep tickin' away.

24th in points per game. They’re also 29th in rebounds per, with the New Jersey Nets (holla!) sitting just behind them. So, day-to-day doesn’t sound so bad now, does it?

There were plenty of good, bad, ugly and indifferent lines on Tuesday night. Let’s see if you can tell which are which!

Kevin Durant has kept his streak of scoring at least 25 points alive. It is now sitting at 22 games. He dropped 33 points and 11 rebounds on the Hawks. Ladies and gentlemen, your second best player in fantasy basketball.

Vince Carter (remember him?) is back from vacation. He took time off from checking his voicemail to play in a good ol’ basketball game last night. And boy did he play. After finishing the month of January with 8.7 points, 0.8 threes, and a 28.4 FG%, it was nice to see him hit 7-of-15 shots and sink two 3-pointers on his way to scoring 17 points and pulling down 11 rebounds. Rejoice! The last time Carter played this well was on Dec. 30 against… the Bucks. Wait, he can play against the Bucks 82 games per year? No? Oh well.

Jameer Nelson (knee) and Mickael Pietrus (ankle) both sat out against said Bucks. Both were considered questionable heading into this one, with Nelson actually indicating that he’d likely play. But, neither ended up getting any PT. Still, Jason Williams continues to make it seem like anything is possible. Can you believe he’s the only “Ja(y)son Williams” who is not wearing a suit right now on a regular basis (whether it be for a job at ESPN or court dates).

You asked for Devin Harris and you got him. In a big way! After missing four straight games (15 on the season) the biggest underachiever on the biggest underachieving team (in the history of the game) posted only his second double-double of the season — 24 points on 7-of-14 shooting, 10-of-11 free throws, and 14 assists in 40 minutes. Peek-a-boo! There’s my boy. No more of this 37% shooting BS, okay? What you liked about this performance was the quickness he showed, the endurance, and the report he had with Brook Lopez (27 points on 11-of-16 shooting). If these two guys played this well together all season long the Nets would have at least 7, maybe 8 wins. Six of Harris’ assists were at the rim, which is a good sign for Lopez owners. Get yours, Harris, but make sure to keep Lopez in the loop.

Ben Wallace made a little history with his single block last night against the Nets. He became the first player under 6′10″ to compile 2,000 blocks in his career. What a feat. In case you’re wondering, Earl Boykins has 29 career blocks (including one, if I recall, on Melo… is that right?).

Zach Randolph would like to use a free pass for his 8-point, 4-rebound performance against the Cavs. Listen, if you own Randolph you know he has about 15 more of those saved up in his back pocket. The dude has been unbelievable this season. You can chalk this one up to the fact that the Grizzlies had played four games in the last five nights and were playing in the second night of a back-to-back set in which they beat the Lakers in an emotional game and then had to take on the Cavaliers. Not easy.

Corey Maggette (hip) sat against the Rockets. This gave (gulp) Coby Karl a chance to show us what he’s capable of — 12 points, 7 assists, 7 rebounds and a steal in 37 minutes. You’ll never see a line like that again out of Karl. Unless he’s playing against his dad’s team and his pops calls for the defense to play a five-dudes-follow-Monta-Ellis defensive set, leaving Karl free to roam.

Hedo Turkoglu (busted up face) didn’t play against the Pacers. He’s considering wearing a mask to protect his pretty face. I’m not sure this is true, but isn’t that how Batman got into doing what he does? (And I’m not talking about saving Gotham, I’m talking about dominatrix. Google it.)

Andrea Bargnani and Chris Bosh combined to score 69 points against the Pacers. Bosh had 35 and Bargnani had…. let me see…. carry the one… add two…. buckled my shoe…. 34 points! These guys need a nickname. Almost three years ago to the day, when I was writing a fantasy hoops column on NBA.com I had come up with, for no real reason, the idea to call Bosh and Bargnani the “Righteous Brothers.” Really, I have no idea why. It was just the first thing that came to mind. Nevertheless, Raptors fans KILLED me on one of their message boards. You would have thought I called them “Captain and Tennille.”

Dudes were pissed! What’s really wrong with the Righteous Brothers anyway?

Well, that’s the big news of the evening.

Wednesday night’s action is in for a treat — as are you. For it’s THE RETURN OF… LOST!! I mean… GREG FOX! Back from reconstructive shoulder surgery (in which he can now throw a baseball 100 mph, a-la Rookie of the Year.) Enjoy.

Daily Lies & Statistics: Like a broken record

It was a busy Monday night despite only seven games on the docket, so let’s get to the recapping. I can’t think of anything better than Kobe Bryant breaking the Lakers’ team scoring record during a loss, so we’ll lead with that. Kobe poured in 44 in a 95-93 defeat at the hands of Memphis, passing Jerry West on the all-time team scoring list. I’m snickering. I’ll let Kevin Ding’s story in the Orange County Register tell the rest of the tale:

[Pau] Gasol has on several occasions offered passive-aggressive comments about not getting the ball enough after Lakers losses in the past. This time, the comments leaned a little harder toward aggressive, particularly when it came to Bryant.

Gasol was asked about Bryant’s new record and offered politically correct – and believably authentic – commentary (“I’m proud of him; I congratulate him”) before adding the kicker: “Now we can focus on winning games again.”

But that’s not all…

Bear in mind that Phil Jackson was a little miffed at Bryant on his historic night, too. Jackson told the team at halftime, when Bryant had 23 of the Lakers’ 50 points, that Bryant was “forcing the action.” Jackson also said in the halftime locker room, alluding to the 29 points Bryant needed in the game to pass Jerry West: “Let’s get him over the hump, so we can play team ball again.”

Punxsutawney Phil saw his shadow, meaning we'll have six more weeks of mindless pundits calling Kobe the best player on the planet.

I’ll be snickering all day. The buffoons who call this guy the “best player on the planet” should be ashamed of themselves. Or maybe I’m just bitter about Kobe’s game-winner vs. the Celtics on Sunday. Imagine if Kobe had actually played with some great big men in his career!

Enough about this guy. In this post and in general. Enough.

Let’s talk about the injuries that have thrust some backups into prominent roles. Chris Paul will probably have surgery on his left knee and could miss well over a month. Darren Collison wasted no time rewarding owners who rushed to pick him up, finishing with 16 points and 14 assists in a 109-100 loss to Phoenix. Get used to the young backcourt of Collison and Marcus Thornton (25 points), as they are gonna get a ton of PT in the near future.

In Utah, Carlos Boozer has a calf injury and Paul Millsap answered the bell in classic Millsap fashion with 25 points, nine boards and four blocks. Speaking of blocks, Boozer has to be on one as his free agency year approaches. The Jazz have Millsap and a desire to not let Boozer walk with nothing coming back. Watch this situation closely.

Fans attending the Sacramento-Denver game probably wanted their money back when they got in their seats and found out neither Tyreke Evans or Carmelo Anthony were playing. Despite the main attractions unavailable, the carnival went on without them and the curmudgeons in the crowd were treated to a 112-109 overtime Nuggets win. Both Evans and Anthony could return in the next game, so don’t get too excited about Beno Udrih or Arron Afflalo. I’m not saying you were, I’m just putting the warning out there.

Boston broke a 67-game losing streak with a 99-88 win at the Wizards, but again I’m not bitter. Ray Allen’s name and expiring $20 million contract have been floating around the rumor mill, and it makes sense for Boston to see what’s out there. Kevin Garnett is still a shell of his former self, but he was solid last night, shooting 8-9 from the field for 19 points and helping force Antawn Jamison into a 2-for-17 atrocity. Paul Pierce sat out the fourth quarter with what’s believed to be a foot sprain, and if he misses any amount of time Tony Allen, who has been a spark lately, should benefit the most from a fantasy perspective.

Portland knocked off Charlotte rather handily, and have now won two in a row without Brandon Roy. Andre Miller had 52 points in a 114-112 win over Dallas on Saturday, then turned around and contributed eight points and 10 assists vs. the Bobcats. It’s called doing what it takes to win, Kobe. Paying attention?

Daily Lies & Statistics: Rap Stars

Well it’s been quite some time since we’ve seen the old Hedo Turkoglu this season. In fact, not since Dec. 13 has he hit the 20-point mark in a game. Finally, though, we got a little taste of what he’s actually capable of on Thursday night against the Knicks– 26 points on 8-of-16 shooting, three treys, 11 rebounds, two steals and a block. Where did that come from? The heart maybe? For the month of January Turkoglu has averaged 9.3 points and 31.1-percent shooting from the floor. He’s been dropable and/or sitable (those are made up fantasy hoops words) over the last 10 games. Now we finally get some real action from him. Let’s hope he can at least give us a few solid scoring performances and shoot over 40 percent from the floor for the next few games. Then we can get serious about putting him back in our lineup. I’m as sacred as you are though, about putting my trust back into the Turk. Burn me once, shame on me. Burn me twice, meet my fist!

When Raptors were Rap Stars...

The other disappointing Raptor, Jose Calderon, played a nice game as well against the Knicks — 12 points, one 3-pointer and seven assists in 24 minutes. He actually led a second quarter charge to help bring the Raptors back into this one. I know that many are looking to drop/move Calderon, but I would say that you shouldn’t do so on the cheap. Jarrett Jack is still the starter, but Calderon’s name has more value than anyone else on your waiver wires. At least try to trade him before dropping him.

Andrea Bargnani seems to be troubled by a sore foot. That seemed pretty evident on against the Knicks — two points on 1-of-9 shooting, three rebounds and three blocks in 30 minutes. I’m soooo tired of these diva Raptors. Make sure to follow his status.

Jared Jeffries left Thursday night’s game early with a hyper-extended knee. He’s not much a factor in 12-team leagues. Al Harrignton also said that he’s going to get his left knee scoped. Might we be talking about Jordan Hill as an option soon? It’s possible. By the way, this is what happens when a team’s best player gets an All-Star snub….

David Lee posted another huge line — 29 points on 13-of-21 shooting, 18 rebounds, three assists and a steal. This after getting snubbed and not being named to the Eastern Conference All-Star team. We fantasy owners don’t care much about records, so the idea that the Knicks aren’t a playoff team doesn’t fly with us. If it helps, Mr. Lee, you would be the starting center for the second all-fantasy team. Feel better? Sure you do.

Kendrick Perkins was ineffective against Dwight Howard on Thursday night. He posted just three rebounds and four points in 15 minutes, thanks mostly to the five quick fouls he picked up.

Rajon Rondo (my man!), after being named to his first All-Star team, failed to pick up a steal against the Magic for the first time in his last 10 games. This was also only the fourth time all season he didn’t record a single steal. Still, Rondo is deserving of being named to the All-Star team.

Vince Carter is on my All-Suck team this year. He once again shot bricks, going 3-of-12 from the floor against the Celtics. After three straight promising games, Carter once again looked useless.

Amar’e Stoudemire needs to get some angry e-mails from his fantasy owners as it seems like he’s mailing it in. Yeah he had 22 points against the Mavs, but he only pulled down one rebound — an offensive board, to boot — in 26 minutes. What a waste. I would much rather prefer a 12-point, 12-rebound performance.

Goran Dragic had 13 points in 15 minutes, helping the Suns get back into this game in the fourth quarter. Unfortunately for him, Jason Richardson is getting back on track — 17 points on 8-of-14 shooting in 28 minutes — so the minutes might not get above 15-18 for Dragic.

Daily Lies & Statistics: The two Coreys

Last week, while he was in the midst of one of the most scintillating fantasy hoops runs of the season, I suggested on Twitter that it was time to sell high on Corey Maggette. Yes, it would hurt. Yes, he was carrying you. Yes, I would like to write an entire post starting each sentence with ‘Yes’.

But there are too many “No”s with this guy. No, he is never healthy. No, he doesn’t play for a sane coach. No, he’s never been consistent.

It was time to sell high on these guys after License to Drive in '88.

So you have the Maggette who was averaging close to 30 points per game in January with a field goal percentage around 57 percent and a free throw percentage around 91. Then you have the Maggette of the last two games: combined 8-35 from the field, 16.5 points, a shouting match with Don Nelson, and an inevitable random “hamstring” injury in the next few days. The happy times are over. All that’s left is a reality show on A&E.

Other thoughts on Wednesday’s action while I ponder why I haven’t taken my own advice and shopped Maggette in the Damn Lies league…

Break up the Nets: New Jersey is 4-40 after a win over the Clippers Wednesday, a game with oodles of fantasy intrigue. Devin Harris sat out with a wrist injury, and he’s been so bad that his fantasy owners were probably thrilled. Keyon Dooling started and outplayed Baron Davis pretty badly, finishing with 18 points, eight assists, two threes and two steals. A pair of Net forwards put up very cool numbers off the bench and should be eyed in all leagues as well. Kris Humphries has already been on our radar for a while, but his 25 and eight last night on 10-14 shooting solidifies him as a strong pickup in all but the shallowest of leagues. Terrence Williams saw 31 minutes of action and went for seven points, nine rebounds and eight assists. With the two of them helping out in a victory, they could make a major impact going forward. Unless the Nets don’t want to win. Then they might be benched. I have no idea.

Give My Love to Rose: The Bulls have now won four in a row after last night’s 96-86 victory in Oklahoma City and have done so against Phoenix, Houston, San Antonio and the Thunder. Vinny Del Negro is clearly the best coach in the game right now. Or maybe Derrick Rose is finally healthy and simply balling. He scored 26 last night and is averaging 25.6 in his last five while shooting over 55 percent from the field. His lack of threes and steals deflates his value, but patient owners have to finally be ecstatic about his recent output.

Carmelo, Roy Remain Out: Carmelo Anthony missed Denver’s 97-92 win at Houston, his second straight game in street clothes, while Brandon Roy has now missed four games with a hamstrings injury and will likely be out through the weekend. Portland fell at home to Utah.

Paul a Beast Lately: Something’s been off for Chris Paul most of this year as he hasn’t been close to the dominant fantasy guy he was in 2008-09. Injuries have played a part in that, but it also looks like any struggles are behind him. He’s averaging a cool 26.4-5.2-10.6 in his last five and is getting back to stealing the ball at a rate we’re accustomed to. Last night against the hapless Warriors, Paul was 38-6-9 with three steals, 14-19 from the field and 9-9 from the line. Hope you haven’t traded him for anyone less than LeBron or Durant.

A Star is Bo: Twitter is all aflutter this morning with news of Zach Randolph making the All-Star team. The reserves will be announced tonight, but we have to say: he deserves it. If only because his monster year is so surprising. I’d love to see Marc Gasol get in as well. Both guys tore up Detroit last night and are playing at a really high level. I put Randolph in a similar category as Maggette: sell high while his value is through the roof. He’s not a shot blocker, offers very little in assists and threes, and simply can’t be better than he’s been.

Some Tim Duncan Appreciation: The 1998 All-Star Game was on the other day, and Tim Duncan was out there, looking and playing exactly the same as he does now (as opposed to Kevin Garnett, who was, jarringly, a jackrabbit out there). I mention this because it was 12 years ago, and last night Duncan gave us a throwback line of 21-27-6, and actually hit all 11 of his free throws. The Spurs beat the upstart Hawks by 15 to boot despite Tim shooting 5-20 from the field. Reports of his demise remain exaggerated, and fantasy owners are again being treated to his customary 20 and 11 with two blocks. Bravo, Tim.

Tonight: Two excellent TNT affairs on the docket with Celtics at Magic and Mavericks at Suns. The Raptors also visit the Knicks with fantasy riches sure to ensue. And in case you hadn’t heard, Gilbert Arenas has been downgraded to doubtful for the rest of the season by David Stern.

The DL&S Mid-Season Awards…AKA the “Damnies”.

Because we here at Damn Lies love nothing more than giving out fantasy awards, we decided to share with you our mid-season winners (and losers). Jeff is working on a song montage about the first 41 games of the season. But until we can figure out how to get it posted on the site, please enjoy our first ever DL&S awards show, heretofore known as “The Damnies”. And it’s Kanye-Free!.

Welcome to the Damnies! Rent a tux and email Tom and Jeff your goofiest midseason fantasy awards.

TOM’S AWARDS

All-Value Team

PG: Tyreke Evans – Leading rookies with 20 ppg. Also adds 4.9 boards, 5.0 assists.
SG: Stephen Curry – Another rookie with a huge impact. Ranked 42nd in Y!
SF: Danilo Gallinari – What can I say? Loved this guy heading into the season.
PF: Carl Landry – The best frontcourt player in Houston. Nope, not Luis Scola.
C: Marc Gasol – The “other” Gasol rather is now known as Marc.

Player I Owe an Apology To: Zach Randolph… I’m sorry. You’re good.

Player I Should Have Seen Coming: Joakim Noah - He was a 10/12/2 guy last season in his per-36 numbers.

Player Who Owes an Apology To Me: Jason Thompson - There are a few, but I thought he would be up in the Top 50 this season. Instead he’s at No. 100, just where he was projected to be. (Jose Calderon got off easy. I will forgive your injury)

Worst Injury: Greg Oden – He was cookin’ before he went down — 11.1 points, 8.5 boards, 2.3 blocks, 60.5 FG%, 76.6 FT%. I may be crazy for saying this, but Oden would have been a Top 20 fantasy baller this season if it weren’t for his injury.

Best Fantasy Coach: Lionel Hollins – No sure how he did it, but he got Allen Iverson to leave the team, Randolph to lead the team, and me to need this team. His Grizzlies are the only team in the league with three 18 PPG scorers and two 9.5 rebounders.

Worst Fantasy Coach: Nah, I’m kidding. You know it’s Don Nelson.

Lifetime Achievement: Kobe Bryant became the youngest player to score 25,000 points. He hit it on Thursday in Cleveland… on a free-throw. Yawn.

Sundiata Gaines Award: Ty Lawson - He came up big when Chauncey Billups went down. It was almost like you still had Chauncey in your lineup. (Randy Foye just missed eligibility.)

Player To Be Named Later: DeMar DeRozan - I have a feeling about him in the second half. Nothing to base it on other than a gut feeling.

Matteen Cleaves Towl Waivin’ Award: Larry Hughes – He’s the best player in the league right now with eight DNP-CD’s over his last 10 games.

JEFF’S AWARDS

The Waiver Wire All-Stars

PG: Brandon Jennings
SG: Tyreke Evans
SF: Danilo Gallinari
PF: Carl Landry
C: Brendan Haywood
FYI: This is my ballot, but I’m soliciting YOUR votes for the Waiver Wire All-Stars, to be announced this week in my Rotoexperts.com and Yahoo! waiver wire column. To vote, simply send your first and second teams to jeff@rotoexperts.com.

The Marcus Can’t Be’s (Guys I swore off who are amazing)
PG: Mo Williams
SG: Stephen Jackson
SF: Carmelo Anthony
PF: Zach Randolph
C: Marcus Camby

The Boris Di-ouch Memorial All-Backpedal Team (Guys I loved in the preseason who are terrible)
PG: Devin Harris
SG: Leandro Barbosa
SF: Tyrus Thomas
PF: Boris Diaw
C: Spencer Hawes

The Damn Lies League Houdini Actors (I’m in first place as of this writing despite drafting these fellows)
PG: Mario Chalmers
SG: Michael Redd
SF: Tyrus Thomas
PF: Rashard Lewis
C: Greg Oden

My Top 5 Desert Island Albums (Greatest Hits not eligible)
PG: London Calling, The Clash
SG: A Hard Day’s Night, The Beatles
SF: Funeral, Arcade Fire
PF: Exile on Main Street, The Rolling Stones
C: Darkness on the Edge of Town, Bruce Springsteen

The Unlikely Second-Half Season-Savers (Technically, a prediction award, but if you think it should be disallowed here, technically, get your own blog)
PG: Andre Miller
SG: Carlos Delfino
SF: Jared Jeffries
PF: DeJuan Blair
C: Robin Lopez

GREG’S AWARDS

This looks like way too much fun. I’ve got to join the foray.

All-LaRue Martin Team (Huge disappointments who have ruined many a fantasy season)
PG: Devin Harris
SG: John Salmons
SF: Hedo Turkoglu
PF: Boris Diaw
C:  Andris Biedrins

All-Stevie Franchise Team (Players in their prime whose careers have come to a screeching halt this season)
PG: Devin Harris
SG: Michael Redd
SF: Josh Howard
PF: Tyrus Thomas
C:  Tyson Chandler

All-Chucky Brown Team (players who desperately need a change of scenery)
PG: TJ Ford
SG: Kevin Martin
SF: Hakim Warrick
PF: Elton Brand
C:  Sam Dalembert

All-Bill Walton Team (Guys who simply can’t stay on the court)
PG: Jameer Nelson/Gilbert Arenas
SG: Ben Gordon
SF: Ron Artest
PF: Kenyon Martin
C:  Greg Oden

All-Bill Cartwright Team (Most annoying guys to own this season)
PG: Mike Conley
SG: Ben Gordon/Eric Gordon
SF: Trevor Ariza
PF: Anthony Randolph
C:  Andrew Bynum

And for my only positive awards…

All-Fat Lever Team (Bargain basement guys who are doing work)
PG: Aaron Brooks/Tyreke Evans
SG: Kirk Hinrich
SF: Danilo Gallinari
PF: Carl Landry
C:  Marc Gasol

Got any awards of your own you’d like to get off your chest? Email Tom or Jeff with your selections. The funnier the better – we’ll give you props if you make us laugh.

Daily Lies & Statistics: Mo’s shoulder, Mo’s problem.

This news is “turrible” if you’re Charles Barkley, but “terrible” if you’re the rest of us: Mo Williams will miss the next 4-6 weeks with a sprained shoulder. Oy vey! I don’t think that people who don’t own Williams realize how valuable of a fantasy baller he really is. Think of the fact that he’s 3rd in the league in threes made (97), 5th in FT% at 89.6 percent, and in the Top 10 among point guards in scoring (16.9) and assists (5.1). It’s a tough loss! He’s not Jason Terry, a guy who he’s typically compared to. He’s better. It’s going to be a tough loss for the Cavs, but possibly even tougher for fantasy owners to rebound from.

So where do they, and you, go from here?

Go Delonte West, young man. In Thursday’s game against the Lakers West was slotted into the starting lineup. He had a mediocre line — 3 points on 1-of-4 shooting, 4 rebounds, 3 assists and 2 blocks in 43 minutes — but it’s easy to give him a pass on this one. I’m not sure how well I would do if I was called upon at the last-minute to try to shut down the Laker backcourt on national t.v. I probably would have posted the same exact line as West. Though, I’m a pretty damn good shooter. Might I have outscored him? OK, everyone relax. Enough about me… I would pick up West in most/all formats.

Daniel “boobie/debbie” Gibson is another guy to loo

You can feel it, it's electric! Boobie, boobie, boobie....Gibson.

k at. He too was limited last night with just 3 points and 2 assists in 20 minutes, but in deep leagues you should look at Gibby. He’s one of the top 3-point shooting guards in the league at 47.4 percent. He’s not a 12-team add, but in 18-team leagues you can now look to Gibson for some 3-point value.

J.J. Hickson should really excel now that Mo Williams is out… nah, I’m kidding. But in his first game without Williams calling the shots Hickson posted his first career double-double with 11 points and a career-high 14 rebounds in 25 minutes. You have to watch for Anderson Varejao, but right now Hickson looks like a nice deep add as well.

Andrew Bynum had some trouble dealing with the Shaq-tus. Bynum went for just 7 points and 8 rebounds in 25 minutes. That’s almost an identical line to the 8 and 8 he posted the night before against Dwight Howard. Yeah, I know, tough matchups. But who among us isn’t worried about Bynum? He’s got one of the best power forwards in the game clogging up the paint and a terrific rebounding sixth man in Lamar Odom.

Eric Gordon (toe) did not play against the Nuggets. There’s no word on whether it was the big toe and it was at the market. What we do know is that he’s day-to-day.

Al Thornton was back in the starting lineup for the Clips and wasted the opportunity. He his just 2-of-7 shots and fouled out in 18 minutes. Booooring. Rasual Butler was moved to the bench, yet came in for 35 minutes. He too bored me as he shot 1-of-5 from the floor.

Craig Smith, best name in basketball, actually led the Clippers in scoring with 21 points and 6 rebounds. Like this guy. Like him now that Blake Griffin is no longer coming back. I would give him a look.

Thirteen games on the schedule for Friday night. Luckily we gave Jeff the night off.

Remember, Brandon Roy is out and Kevin Garnett is questionable.