Daily Lies & Statistics: Making a lasagna for one

What a fantastic day yesterday as Allen Iverson Waterworks, Inc. staged another fabulous press conference for their client, one Allen Iverson. He’s returning to play for the 76ers, in case you hadn’t heard, and Philadelphia is fulfilling Philly’s prophecy that if you talk about how Iverson will boost ticket and jersey sales over and over and over ad, um, nausea, then the public will just sort of do it. And whoop. Dee. Doo. Philadelphia is relevant again in the NBA, in the sense of: they could go .500 this season if everything breaks right. But the Sixers don’t really mean it in that sense, do they? They mean it in the sense of: let’s see how much money we can squeeze out of the denizens of our fine city.

Allen Iverson was a wreck yesterday, laying it on thick for the lapdogs and winning over the hearts of a population in full Reflection Mode. Iverson was a magnetic superstar for this humble suburb of South Jersey for many years, and it’s not surprising that fans are drawn to him again.

I was weeping myself during Iverson’s remarks. But that’s only because I’m a Lou Williams owner. Williams, already out two months with a broken jaw, is now in danger of never being a fantasy factor again this year, especially if Iverson starts playing well. With only Jrue Holiday and Willie Green to overtake in the backcourt, that’s a distinct possibility.

And what of Andre Iguodala? Isn’t this his team now? Because Iverson left two years ago? Does he really want to go back in time? Now that he’s a better player than Iverson, I highly doubt it.

Incidentally, there were three games last night. Despite getting outrebounded by 23, Boston won at San Antonio, 90-83, in a statement game. Denver blew out Miami, 114-96, and Houston held on for a 111-109 win at Golden State.

Here are the notable performances:

DeJuan Blair – 18 points, 11 rebounds, 2 blocks in 22 minutes. An exceptional showing against Boston’s frontline, and this kid is due for a great season both backing up and playing alongside Tim Duncan.

Kevin Garnett – Not usually notable when he does something well, but he has been particularly good lately. In his last five games, he is shooting an obscene 72.0 percent from the field while averaging 18.2 points. He had a 20-7-5 last night and is settling into a nice Chris Webber late-in-his-career mode (elbow jump shooter who is savvy enough to pass well and grab a few rebounds).

Chris Andersen – 9 points, 10 boards, 2 steals, 3 blocks. That’s the Andersen we’ve come to know and look at funny. 15 blocks in his last five games.

Carl Landry – Continues to flat-out ball with 22 points, 9 rebounds, 2 steals, 3 blocks, 8-10 FG and 6-6 FT vs. the Warriors. That I don’t own him in any league makes me break into cold sweats at night.

Vladimir Radmanovic – 20 points, 8 rebounds, 6 assists, 4 threes, 3 steals last night. He’ll go 2-2-1 next game, so I’m not going to go crazy recommending him, but this was a nice line. The Warriors are getting some bodies back, but Radmanovic is outplaying Corey Maggette right now.

Don Nelson – Back on the Warriors bench but he is still suffering from the rocking pneumonia and the boogie-woogie flu. He’s been told to stay home, and fantasy owners couldn’t be happier. Get better, Nellie, but take your time.

Okay, I gotta go. For your information there’s an inflammation in my tear gland. Also, I’m wanted in several states for the murder of Andris Biedrins‘ career.

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